If You Don’t Know, Now You Know: Boris Johnson | The Daily Show


Donald Trump is a big fan
of Boris Johnson. And when you look into it,
it makes sense, right? They were both born
in New York City. Both of them had
famous cheating scandals. Uh, they have
similar political beliefs. And… look at them. I mean, look at them. They look like
they were separated at birth. And I mean purposely, like, separated at birth. Like, the nurse was like,
“These two humans should not be “in the same place
at the same time! “Send one to England,
send one to the U.S., and pray they never meet!” Another thing
that makes them similar is that, for years, no one took
either of them seriously. And now, just like Trump, Boris is poised to become
the leader of his country. Which used to be a cool job
but, thanks to Brexit, is about as desirable as being Kanye West’s
social media manager, you know? It’s just like, “What? He said
what? No, delete, delete! Jesus was not wearing Yeezys
on the cross! No!” But who is the man
many have dubbed the Donald Trump of the UK? Well, we thought
why not get to know him in another installment of
If You Don’t Know, Now You Know. -♪ ♪
-(cheering and applause) Meet Boris Johnson, British politician and stunt double for
Jeff Daniels in Dumb and Dumber. Now, many of you
might be hearing about him for the first time,
but, in Britain, he’s a household name. REPORTER: Alexander Boris
de Pfeffel Johnson is the only British politician known universally
by a first name. REPORTER 2: Boris. He began
his career as a journalist. Johnson spent eight years
as mayor of London, always willing
to perform for the cameras. REPORTER 3:
Johnson struck political gold when Britain hosted
the 2012 Olympics. He gained praise for steering London smoothly
through the event. There were a few embarrassing
moments for Johnson, most notably when he got stuck
on a zip wire. (indistinct chatter) Oh, man,
that is so embarrassing. Stuck on a zip line up there. I guess,
at the same time though, it’s probably good preparation
for handling Brexit. You know? Just like, “Oh, boy.
How do I get out of this? “Any ideas? Any ideas? I thought
it would be much easier.” So, Boris was
the mayor of London and a character who did things
that made people laugh. But, just like Trump, he also gained a reputation
for his trash talk. Boris Johnson has refused
to bow to calls from all sides to apologize for saying
women who wear face veils look like bank robbers
and letter boxes. Johnson also blasted
the president’s decision to move a bust of Winston
Churchill from the Oval Office. He called it…
(reading): REPORTER: He described
Hillary Clinton as having “dyed blonde hair, pouty lips, “and a steely blue stare, like a sadistic nurse
in a mental hospital.” REPORTER 2:
This on President Putin. (reading): Okay. I honestly can’t believe he said
those things about Muslim women and Hillary Clinton, but… you do have to admit, Vladimir Putin
does look like Dobby. I mean, he does. You know? Looks like Dobby got
a job at KPMG. Like, look at him. But, still, but, still,
it’s pretty ballsy for Boris to make fun of someone for looking like
a Harry Potter character when he looks like
a midlife crisis Malfoy. I mean… look at him. Like, he looks like Malfoy
got addicted to potions and has been trying to sustain
his habit ever since. And despite
his controversial quotes, Boris has continued to rise
in British politics. In fact,
after serving as London’s mayor, he joined Parliament
and became a prominent voice for one of the biggest blunders in British political history,
Brexit. REPORTER:
The Leave campaign, which says Europe costs too much
and controls too much, has been led by former
London Mayor Boris Johnson. REPORTER 2: Boris Johnson
believes he owns the victory. Vote leave, my friends.
Vote leave. I believe that this Thursday can be our country’s
Independence Day. When you look at the EU now, makes me think of some… of some badly designed… undergarment that is– that has now become too tight
in some places, far too tight,
far too constrictive, and dangerously loose
in-in other places. (laughter) What? Forget Brexit. What’s going on
with this dude’s underwear, man? Like, did he forget to take off
that zip line harness? Is that what happened there? It’s almost like he was
so distracted by his uncomfortable underwear
that it just, like, snuck into his speech.
He’s like, “My friends,
Britain is like a-a wedgie “being pulled deeper and deeper
into the butt crack “of the European Union
and, you know, “squeezing the testicles tight
against my body, “which was enjoyable at first
but has become extremely, “extremely uncomfortable
ever since. “Now, if you’ll excuse me,
I’m headed to the bathroom to save the testes
that I have remaining.” Now, here’s what’s crazy.
Here’s what’s crazy. Before the Brexit vote, Boris lied to voters in Britain about the benefits
of leaving the EU. And now that Theresa May
has taken most of the Brexit backlash, he might get her job. But he’s part of the reason
that she’s losing it. Huh? And you thought
the patriarchy was dying, baby. Huh? We need to throw
a patriarchy parade. I’ll see you guys in Boston.
Yeah! So, that is
Boris Kerfuffle Johnson, the man who might soon be
at the helm of Great Britain. And I don’t know if he’d be
a good prime minister or not, but I do know
is that he definitely deserves his own sitcom. And that’s why we made it. (upbeat music playing) ♪ ♪ That is a big fish. ♪ ♪ Get me a ladder. Ow. (music ends) (British accent): Bloody
brilliant.

Maurice Vega

100 Responses

  1. If you're wondering why American media is ridiculing the new British Prime Minister it's because the American media is the primary source of news in the UK. When I was in England and in Ireland all I saw on most TV stations was American news. They are pushing propaganda all over the world.

  2. Brexit is a blunder but the people voted for it. Then a three week old party called the Brexit Party took the most votes in the EU elections. The EU just doesn't want to lose those UK pounds, but it's going down on October 31st.

  3. They came cut from the same cloth and share the same corrupt and dishonest intent. Two sociopaths in love with injustices.

  4. Dayum Boris You was about to kill that child @ 6:29.
    I Hope the Child is Ok.
    I dont really blame Boris for that bcz he surely was playing among his own mental peers there.

    Dayum that hit tho…

  5. Yeah you getting boring dude everyone you trying to compare to Trump. The other day you made Pakistani version of trump. So if no trump then no the daily show with douche

  6. Takin a page straight out the Damn Yanks playbook. Make the court jester king and he will entertain the kingdom while the real leaders are pullin the strings from behind the scenes.

  7. You're just a SIMP sire. Why would you claim he lied about the Brexit. You're just a clown. Be that and stop meddling with politics bro.

  8. boris like trump is product of peoples stupidity…so do not cry..enjoy in food you create..

  9. Pretty dumb people becoming presidents and PMs of the world s powerful nations. That doesnt seem to be a coincidence indeed

  10. Boris ? He’s funny as Shit I don’t understand what half you lefty wack jobs are talking about. Satire is lacking the fact in the funnies thanks to our So Lovable Funny African with a big bug up his Ass aka, host.

  11. South-Africa ……….where we kill tourists for the fake gold chains on their necks……especially in the Cape Flats…….kom huistoe Trevor …jou ou grapgat.

  12. It's SO clear that Trevor's audience is absolutely clueless politically….

    His simpleton formula:
    Just parrot of far left talking points, sprinkle some "orange man bad" and call it a day.

  13. and you the biggest clown trevor, your ratings have dropped, nobody is watching your show because your shit and yous think ya funny but not really, now thats hilarious

  14. the worst part of it is, your country south africa trevor is an absolute disgusting mess, where crime is worse than a war zone, where the garbage is overflowing in the streets ajnd politicians are raping whats liitle left of the tax base, nope its a joke…….pls say something or go home and help, they need comedians like you

  15. >For years, no one took him seriously
    >He was the mayor of London ( the most cosmopolitan city in England ) for EIGHT years

    Just pick one

  16. Why would anyone listen to Liberals' interpretation of reality? Not only are they Communists and homosexuals but they are just God-damned liars.

  17. I feel so sad for England ,They now have a trump,……………………………….Who's breeding these things?

  18. June 14, 1946 Donald Trump's date of birth
    June 19, 1964 Borris Johnson's date of birth

    They're both Gemini. Maybe they're one soul in 2 different bodies 😅

    Politics is getting interesting now

  19. No he's probably a guy we need. Because the world is already crazy. Then he looks good. You see. The other are impossible, so you go with boris. Okay ? Globalism !? Islam !? Getting killed !? No no ….

  20. Man ……world just got the most funniest prime minister ever but still the world can't laugh at it…..

  21. Idiocracy has now become the norm 🤦🏾‍♂️ and if you havent seen it after this vid plz watch and tell me were not living this moving in real time

  22. They said he was born in upper eastside New york so how the hell do you become prime minister of Britain 🤔🤨

  23. Yeaaa. Imagin .!!
    The country which never had an independece day .now seeking one.
    Boris will do it
    Horray horray its an independece day

  24. Britain want independence when in the past, they have controlled America and many African nations FOR YEARS!!!

  25. Maybe its all those anti nazi movies, but I find blonde men obnoxious. 😆 Blonde girls, on the other hand….hellooo 😜

  26. Im a far left labour supporter and I think the same about niqabs. Religious fundamentalists can shove a pineapple up their waste-of-oxygen assholes, theyre like cancer in a society that were trying to make secular.

  27. Oh boy.. How Libtards are once Again moaning and crying . Just can't wait 2020..that would be a hatrick. ..
    And reality is racist ain't it? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  28. He really knocked Hillary Clinton out with those words… To be insulted with a British accent is so very painful to the ears.

  29. Englands prime ministers keep giving up, what does that say. They’re problem is most English people are just like Boris racist and backwards with little to none understanding ability

  30. Sorry for incorrect English, I’m from the NL. I have one question for you guys. When do you finally see the difference in the amount of horrible jokes about Christianity compared to other religions? It’s easy and hypocritical!

  31. his grandfather was Muslim, so he might have this problem which forced him to be anti muslims, so he can prove to him self he has no relation with immigrants.

  32. Why would an American President especially an African American , want to look at the bust of a politician who represented the worst aspects of the colonial era and was responsible for the deaths of innumerable civilians in British colonies ?
    For that matter, why would anyone choose to do so ?

  33. As for Brexit, it's pretty asinine to pronounce it to be a blunder for it ought to be kept in mind that it wasn't a sorely political decision , but one that was based on a referendum , and the majority of the British people decided for it . Was the decision counterfactual is the concern of posterity and as everything else in life , shall be decided upon in due time , and by the British people whose fate depends on the sagacity of this determination.
    Calling it a blunder when it hasn't even started its course and negotiations are still on to finalize the niceties of the seperation is disrespectful of the British people and their mandate .
    It's no different from the wisecrack often made by white South Africans , given the mess South Africa is today, that ending Apartheid and handing over power to negroes was a great misstep .

  34. Noah made a good insult on Johnson! To add, though he's been in gov't more longer than Trump, he's just as racist like our President!

  35. The Hillary comment would make me vote for him. NO person should be allowed to wear a mask in public, and that includes cops. If you feel that devout stay out of the public.

  36. https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/national-security/trump-admin-will-apparently-not-renew-program-fight-domestic-terror-n926361
    Oct. 31, 2018, 9:53 AM PDT By Laura Strickler WASHINGTON — The Trump administration, which already canceled a grant for a group that fights white supremacist terror, now appears unwilling to renew the anti-domestic terror program under which it was funded, despite recent high-profile attacks like the Pittsburgh synagogue shooting and data showing a spike in attacks on religious minorities.

    The Obama administration launched the Countering Violent Extremism Grant Program in 2016 to fight domestic terrorism. Managed by the Department of Homeland Security, the program was given $10 million to distribute.

    In the last days of the Obama administration, DHS awarded the money to more than two dozen groups around the country to counter violent extremism of all kinds, including right-wing extremism. Data from the Global Terrorism Database shows there was a spike in attacks on American religious organizations in 2016-17. AND

    https://thehill.com/policy/national-security/346552-trump-cut-funds-to-fight-anti-right-wing-violence

  37. So British Johnson wants Britain out of EU but has sworn that a country like Nigeria is indivisible? Biafra wants out of Nigeria.

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