How can we go to the bathroom? (An investigation of potty politics)


Lately there’s been a lot of talk about
going to the bathroom. How we should do it, if it’s safe, and what it does or doesn’t have to do with our genitals. Usually when I go to the bathroom it’s
because an organ in my body needs to expel something out of a hole in my body.
There are other reasons like to socialize, wash my hands, clean a stain
off my clothes, check myself out in the mirror to get seaweed out of my braces.
But mostly, the holes need to direct byproducts of my human functioning into
this bowl shape, or this one. I squat, expel, them push a button or handle and an
incredible plumbing system designed over time by all these other humans carries
my excretions to a water treatment facility. Before all this, going to the
bathroom was what public health experts call “open defecation”, like my dogs. No
shame. No privacy. No need for it. Then came the advent of ceramics. Pots and the
like made by heating clay until it hardens. Because they could hold liquid, our
ancestors were like, “Oh my goodness! I’m going to poop in this!” I’m sure you could imagine the convenience of no longer having to be in the cold or rain outside with predators or in the darkness. To have
a pot stored under your bed and “Gardez l’eau!” just toss the contents out the window to the
street below. According to Julie Horan and her toilet history book, when a man
and woman walked down the street “it was polite for him to get hit with the
contents of the chamber pot and spare the woman”. The chamber pot created all
sorts of new social customs. Renting out potties for parties, molding or painting
people they dislike in them to piss and shit on, expecting slaves or servants to empty
the waste of the wealthy, but locking up the excrement of the wealthy royal so
that thieves couldn’t steal their prestigious poop. Speaking of the royals
for more than four hundred years, there was an honorable position in the court
of the English king called the “groom of the stool” who got to wipe the Kings ass. And
in these intimate moments, be his adviser and confidant. The position wasn’t humiliating
but there was certainly an element of seclusion to the task. In fact, urinating
and defecating became private, hush-hush, across all classes. For example, there
were chamber pots their read, “keep me clean and use me well and what I see I will
not tell!”. And there was a human bathroom, a man who’d walk around with a chamber pot and for a token, set it down and create a tent with his cloak for private use. See no poop, hear no pooping, speak
nothing of poop. Growing up, I learned the unsaid practice of looking under the
stalls and listening for others to leave the bathroom before flatulating or
defecating. And if it was a matter unloading emergency, I’d flush the toilet to
hide the sounds. Even though they’re some of the most universal sounds in the
world. This is a photo of the toilet I, doctor Doe, used for a month while
living in a zoo in Mexico. The owner of the zoo asked me to write instructions on
the outside for how to use it properly, but since I don’t speak Spanish and most
of their visitors don’t speak English I went with a simple image instead. Urine goes in the front hole and feces goes in the back hole. Pads, tampons, etcetera go into the container nearby. No designation of race, gender, or sex like
these other signs from our history or worldwide that mandate who uses the
bathroom rather than how they’re used. Like the USA Uniform Plumbing Code 413.3
which states, “separate toilet facilities shall be provided for each sex,”. According
to harvard professor Jeannie Suk, “The growth of women’s presence in public
life led to the desire to protect them from the crude dangers of the male world,”.
There was this attitude that women were unfit for the occupations of civil life,
so if we’re gonna let them into factories, offices, libraries, department
stores, banks, and on trains then we need for them to have designated areas and
entrances. This is where we get to present day bathroom politics. In some
places, stick figure with a skirt means “safe space and bathroom for women”. In other
places, it means “toilet for a person with a vagina or female designation on
their birth certificate”. David Cohen explains in his paper the stubborn
persistence of sex segregation that politically, “… sex refers to apparent
biological distinctions whereas gender refers to the attributes society
generally associates with biologically different sexes,”. So if a bathroom is sex
segregated, Buck Angel who has a vulva and vagina is expected to use the stick
figure with a skirt bathroom. But, if a bathroom is gender-segregated them Buck Angel is
expected to use the stick figure with pants bathroom. Other places, like here in
Missoula, Montana – female, male, intersex, feminine, masculine, gender non-conforming,
queer, etcetera- can choose any public stall, troff, or urinal and use the
bathroom in peace. I’ll read part of the ordinance to you. “The city
finds that discrimination in the areas of employment, public accommodations, and
housing is a serious threat to the health, safety, and general welfare of the
community.” Discrimination is a threat to our
community. So Buck, the bathrooms are down the hall by the elevator. Use whichever
you’d like. California has taken this a step further by actually changing many of
their bathroom signs to a triangle in a circle, that means – wait for it – Bathroom. I would have gone with the
rounded swoop swoop shape of a butt that we used in the seventeen
hundreds to mark toilets, but triangles are simple and inclusive too. We’ve made
Sexplanations versions of both for you to print off and hang on your own
stalls. Before you go do that though, let’s address some of the biggest concerns
with freely accessible toilets. number 1, cooties. This is the idea that one group is
cleaner and more pure than another. Like, the ideology of racial taint. That black
people are going to dirty white people if they share toilets. This is racism. Or thinking boys or girls have cooties. That’s sexism. Reject both! Two, “people are gonna see my genitals!” This is no different with this sign or this one. If there are people around and you’re naked, then they may see your
genitals. But why are we trying to maintain Victorian ideals of genital
mystery anyway? that “You’ll have to wait until our wedding night to learn where
my urine comes from.” if you’re not intentionally flashing someone or
disrespecting boundaries then there should be no shame or sense of loss. and
three, there’s this fear that penises and vaginas in the same bathroom will lead to
sexual assaults. If I go into a bathroom and someone else of any sex, gender,
genitalia, etcetera comes into the bathroom to go to the bathroom, than no
sexual assault happens. If I go into a bathroom and someone else of any sex,
gender, genitalia, etcetera comes into the bathroom to sexually assault me, it isn’t
because the sign gave them permission. These signs and these toilets ultimately
mean one thing: This is a place for relief. How we go to the bathroom will
continue to change with time and place. The only thing our sexual health and genitals have to do with it is that we wipe them front-to-back. Stay curious. According. Blah. Accorder, blahhh. Nope, nope, uh uh. Excrement… There were chamber pots that read, “Keep me clean and use me well and what I see I will not tell” and shut up
truck ’cause I’m trying to do this.

Maurice Vega

100 Responses

  1. My mom is really against unisex bathrooms, to say the least. So is my dad- they both believe that this will encourage perverts, and that places should just have a third 'family' restroom and make trans-people use that. (Which kind of misses the point and kind of constantly reminds trans-people that they were another gender once, but while they're pretty progressive with homosexuality and bisexuality, they don't really get non-cis gender identities.) The last time they talked about this with me (when I brought up a friend who came out as a transman), I asked them why they aren't concerned about sharing restrooms with homosexuals who could, due to their attraction to members of their own sex/gender, potentially use public restrooms for voyeuristic purposes. Conversation over. Silence. They can't respond to that.

    I thought at least my mom would, because she had a lesbian stalker when she was in middle school and could theoretically have something of a excuse to feel wary around lesbians (a prejudiced, narrow, and still pretty unfair excuse, but a precedent nonetheless), but even she couldn't find anything to say. HUH.

  2. A lot of men's rooms don't have changing tables. Once I was in a pub and in the back there was an extra men's room and I had to poop when I got in there it only had a urinal and sink. Bathrooms should mark what features are available toilet, urinal, changing table.

  3. I can't decide whether her eyes are scary or arousing. Some kind of combination of the two.. IDK…

  4. As a man I can say that you ladies may want to retain separate facilities on account of how badly men's public conveniences smell….

  5. I don't know about other places, but in high school restrooms, in the boy's room 95+% if the time the seat will have a layer of urine on it. I am pretty sure this doesn't happen in the girls restroom, but I am not sure because I have yet to make it to the point in my transition where I am comfortable with using the girls restroom.

  6. This video pretty much presents all the facts behind this issue. It also accurately displays how irrational some people are.

  7. I love ya Dr. Doe but I think having a bathroom for each gender is a necessity. I think if it's that big of a deal for transgenders then they should push to make establishments have 3 bathrooms, 1 for males, 1 for females, and 1 an open bathroom for anyone, that way everyone is comfortable. But I don't think it's ok to take away other people's rights of feeling safe just to make a minority more comfy. It would be ignorant not to acknowledge the fact that sexual predators are jumping in their seats waiting for the freedom to causally walk into the opposite genders bathroom and be able to do what they want more easily. There is already sexual assaults happening in bathrooms all across the country as it is and who knows how many times a predator didn't go through with their plans because they were afraid of someone seeing them walk into the wrong bathroom and reporting it. Do you really think sexual predators or voyeurs aren't going to be taking advantage of this?

  8. I feel the same about unisex bathrooms as I do about concealed carry, I don't care what you're packing as long as you don't point it at me. Why washing your hands next to someone of the opposite sex bothers people is beyond my comprehension.

  9. two summers ago I was working at a children's camp and part of my job, since it was in a public building, was escorting children to the bathroom. there was one kid named Amelia, who clearly did not feel like a girl as most Amelias tend to be (as a nonbinary person, I picked up on Amelia's behaviors that indicated this). Amelia had been hanging out with all of the other boys at the camp, all the campers and counsellors used he/him pronouns, he dressed like a boy. The one issue was the restroom. He did not use the bathroom for most of the two weeks we were there. in the middle of the second week, one of the girls and Amelia needed to use the restroom. I took them down there, the girl went into the restroom, and Amelia stood between the two doors, looking at each one. He turned to me, and I said "you can use either one" with a smile. His face completely lit up as he said "Really?!" and he went straight into the men's room.when talking about bathroom politics, those who favor segregating on sex rather than gender often ignore the children who are discovering their gender. if Amelia used the women's restroom, the girl that went in there would have spread this information around the camp, and the children Amelia had been playing with would have probably ditched him. But of course, as I was in charge of them, I feared for Amelias safety in the men's restroom,, that a man would have gone in and thought there was a little girl in the bathroom.

  10. In Mel Brook's "History of the World: Part I," Count de Monet told Louis XVI, "You look like the piss boy!"

  11. Two questions and I welcome responses. What about the locker or changing room. They have been separated by the same rules as the bathroom so following the same logic should they become unisex as well? And also I'm a male and not threatened by the idea of females in the bathroom but these days more and more "safe spaces" for women are appearing and that's accepted, so might the people pushing for those safe spaces have a problem with unisex bathrooms?

  12. Ok, how the hell do people empty a chamber pot with absolutely NO CONCERN for where its contents land, that they will empty it right onto the body of another person?

    Did it not occur to anyone to walk it down to the ground level, and dump it only a foot above the ground?

  13. It was not that "women were unfit for public life" but it was the attitude that women were above normal, or public life. Like you pointed out with men being expected to be hit by emptied chamber pots, the public world was considered dirty, harsh, cruel and generally something that people of high-class society avoided, and women for the most part were considered high-class people. (unless you were poor, but that is a universal rule throughout time and space). And as for the rest of what you said, it is incoherent, nonsensical and mostly crazy talk.

  14. Yes, equality means all places will have adequate accommodations for all. I remember hearing stories of women's bathrooms being few and far between. Sports Facilities, Fire Stations, Police Departments, Factories, and many other places need to improve or share better.

  15. So, you perceive a need to wipe a certain direction, or in females TWO directions? I did hear you say, "front to back", which differs from a purely safety stand point, not to mention the bio-mechanics. Yet, you fail to accommodate the biases of millions! (left hand ONLY). TG bathrooms? Are you opting for rule of the militant minorities? That seems to be one step removed from anarchy. LSM presents LGBT as a valid yardstick of mores. What tripe. 3.8% of the adult population is not a valid protocol upon which to base "normality", Point of fact that percentage is queer in the words purest meaning. Over and above that, 0.3 percent as transgender should not even be a consideration for a law. For 3 people in a thousand to demand anything is absurdity ad infinitum. Perhaps a realistic solution is NO PUBLIC Shitters at all. then there would be absolutely no discrimination of anyone.

  16. I have always felt that my feminine side is just as strong as my masculine side and I have never felt like I can be my full self in a gender or sex segregated setting so I avoid socializing in bathrooms even while at the sink because I feel like half of me is always being actively excluded.

  17. You are misguided about the sexual assault issue. What this transgender issue has done, is allow totally straight men to enter a woman's bathroom, in the hopes of seeing them, or seeing what youngsters they can steal and grope. All we mentally well people ask, is that they use the bathroom of the sex they were born, and biologically still are no matter how many surgeries they have had. DNA never changes. PERIOD!!!!

  18. When to comes to the bathroom debate and sexual assault, it's not that people are concerned that neutral bathrooms will give "permission" rather that they'll provide opportunity for sexual assault.

  19. Unbelievably NAÏVE !!No idea of Risk Management and Risk Minimization.I am reminded of your recent VBLOG on moving your office and your recounting of a colleague who is now a paraplegic.
    You contribute to Female stereotypes. REALLY BAD ADVICE !

  20. I had job at a supermarket and part of my job was cleaning the public restrooms. While from time to time there was a puddle in the men bathroom I hated going into the women's bathroom It was always filthy. Women for some reason would make such a mess in there.

  21. Welp, that's it then. You are my hero. And I don't even agree with everything you say. But 99% of what you say is impressive and impressively well said. And it SOOOOO badly needs to be said.

  22. I learned so much in this video, like so many of yours. You rock Dr. Lindsey Doe. Glad to have someone at my university recommend you 🙂

  23. At school a while back, I was entering the women's bathroom and this one person was leaving, (I assume they were a woman dressed masculinly) and at first I was kinda surprised, but then I realized that I didn't really care and it has not effect on me who else uses the bathroom. I do hope that unisex bathrooms will become a thing someday

  24. Cooties! That game took me back about 65 years. I had no idea that it was still available. Serendipity rules.

  25. I don't understand why women, who are already so hysterically fearful and obsessed with their "sense of safety" and their microdiscomforts, want to now bring strange men into the bathroom with them. Men should reject this adamantly as it can only be – and is clearly intended to be – just another occasion for false accusation, the preferred weapon against men in the competition for position and wealth.

  26. Lindsay Doe, your "sexplanations" are bogus ideology mispackaged as science or medicine that serve as its Trojan Horse.

  27. You can wipe however you like, but some people find it easier and cleaner to wipe back to front. Though I still wipe my front before my back, I wipe back to front…

  28. It’s not a skirt it’s a super hero cape

    Edit: also, if people were worried about getting sexually assault Ed by the opposite gender, why wouldn’t they be worried about being assuaged by the same gender… not all people are straight.

  29. Horan did not know shit about the why of men on the left. The point was not to be a poo receptor but to keep his SWORD ARM free.

  30. You are not looking at the really! There are perverts out there! All your liberal BS is not going to change this! I like your videos! Most of the time I like what you say But this just is BS!

  31. Love the three shell reference at the end. I live in Thailand and there are tons of Ladyboys (this is NOT a derogatory term, it is how they refer to themselves) and they use the female bathrooms and no one really cares. Also, many places such as shopping malls, restaurants, hotels, …, have bathroom attendants and they are typically female and again no on really seems to care that women are in the men's room. I do not know if they have male attendants in the female bathrooms.

  32. Growing up I was taught to never go to the town bathrooms especially after dark alone regardless of weather they were male of female toilets. Not because people could come in, use them and decide to harm me but because they are secluded places, with small spaces making it harder to defend myself, with a door that can lock on the inside with no easy way for help to reach me. When guys would ask us girls why we always went to the bathroom in groups we would tell them plainly that it was for defense by numbers. In my home town it sadly was a necessary precaution. The council countered this with electric bathrooms that unlock automatically after a set amount of time with good lighting and a camera set at the waiting entrance to discourage the behavior but it never had anything to do with the gender of the attacker.

  33. In the UK there’s a law that a pregnant woman may request the use of a Police Officers helmet to relieve Herself 😂
    Also that one may legally relieve themselves in the street, if they Emit 3 loud cries beforehand !!! 😀

  34. There is a seldom mentioned (by people like you) concern in the minds of some parents about the perceived special threat to young children, particularly girls, from male pedophiles in restrooms. I am not sure what I think about that. I have personally been upset by drunks and homosexuals.

  35. It happened once to me in a public place bathroom one women was really in a hurry to go to the bathroom and all the toilet’s on the women side were in used and she asked me if there was some unoccupied toilets on the men side! There was some available. I explained the situation to the guys there to make sure that none would be surprised to see that women coming to our side. Everything was find. Why would there be a problem? Most people are not that stupid. 😃😃😃 There is an agreed rule by all men that a pregnant women can use any bathroom she wants on short notice. We could argue that it is for here baby for which we do not know the sex yet so we give the here benefits of the doubt! 😃😃😃
    Once when that happened my son who was 5 years old at the time told here that she was not aloud. She had a good laugh on that one!

  36. I like unisex restrooms because I like using the toilet stall knowing a woman is next to me pooping 💩 and I hear it. Don’t you guys like that too?

    Oddly enough in San Diego in a restaurant that isn’t that anymore but the restroom was unisex and one stall had no door for some reason and if you washed your hands at the sink in front of the stall you can see a lady pooping in that toilet stall when you look in the mirror.

  37. Putting men in the multi person ladies room along with little girls is hardly liberating. Anyone claiming it is, is putting up a lame argument. The solution is more single person and family toilet rooms that can be locked once your inside

  38. Except in France . Over here everyone use the same set of toilets if the other sex's is being cleaned or repaired or whatever

  39. There should be more unisex bathrooms in every places like shopping centres and schools too..anywhere in the public places..it’s the 21st century for crying out loud..to use these bathrooms,is simple I respect your privacy and you respect my..thats how I see it when I used one before..I walked in and there were 3 ladies in there already,they say nothing to me,just a nod at me and smile and that was it.they respected me and I respected them back..

  40. Were you teaching the monkeys something or were they teaching you? I wish people were as informed and as unprejudicial as the doctor. I once heard those bowls referred to as "thunder pots."

  41. Liberals can find discrimination in anything. It has been set up for years and can save embarrassment for shy people, or those with traditional manners. No need to change to spare your twisted mind's feelings about sex or injustice. If you have a penis, we use the Male bathroom. If we have a vagina, we use the female bathroom. If you have both, suit yourself. Got a problem with that? Find a country that suits your feelings to a T, and move. Otherwise stop trying to change cultural moreys that have worked fairly well for hundreds of years.

  42. Most of the world go to the "bathroom" to use the bath, and to the toilet to crap or pee. Why do Americans call the toilet a bathroom?

  43. There was never any amount or degree of problems such as these ridiculous and shameful ones, before the perverts in society & govt chose to defy and pervert nature. The unfortunate, embarrassing, but hitherto, discreet problem of hermaphrodites have been leavened & exploited by the perverse, and utterly small segment of society that cross-dresses, &/or mutilates their genitalia in a "sex-change" surgery. More of the "enlightened left" should consider that the vast majority of those that have their genitals mutilated in a "sex-change" procedure, ultimately regret it, and after such foolish & wicked spirits depart from them, are drawn further towards desperation, dysfunction, and suicide. Except for the pitiful souls born as hermaphrodites, "sex-change" surgery should be discouraged as it does more harm than good to all concerned. Perverse surgeons may be able to to turn a prick or a cunt wrong side out, but the genetics remain the same and only the willing are fooled. If "transgenderism" were truly proper & successful, then the "bathroom-issue" wd never come to debate, as no parent would ever try to stop some perverted s.o.b. with make-up, skirt, high-heels, & thinly-vieled adams-apple as big as a purse-seine cork, sideburns, five o'clock shadow, broad shoulders, big hands, and falsetto voice from going into the same publick restroom as their young daughter – or to stop some bull-bitch dressed like a lumberjack go into piss beside their young son. You can try and sound as lofty, technical, and smug as you like, but Western Civilization functioned and flourished more perfectly for much longer, and secured the freedom to express yourself which you now use to dismantle it. All of the immortal and perverse curse the blood and toil of those that secured freedom of expression and have perverted it. They are sawing the limb upon which they sit, and undermine their own tower. There is room and a place for perverts to dwell & frollick, but they are a small minority. The tail wants to wag the dog, and it doesn't matter if you're Christian, heathen, pagan, aetheist, or agnostic – the tail wagging the dog is wrong, and that's what the LGBT and their cohorts are promulgating. It is WRONG, just as 2+3=7 is WRONG.

  44. I never understood the problem with different sexes in the bathroom. When you go to the bathroom, you close the door right? So you are in your own private little stall where no men or woman or anyone in between has to see anything. They could while using a urinal, but men can pee in toilet bowls too right? why do we need separate devices for people with penises to pee in? Just go into the bathroom, lock the stall door, and everyone is happy!

  45. You are a great looking woman and your videos are amusing except for one thing – when you edit them you remove the spaces between sentences…. that makes them hard work to watch and , well , actually BORING !

  46. Before indoor toilets, there used to be multi hole outhouses in the country where people of both genders could sit side of each other while performing their natural bodily functions. This was considered perfectly normal and completely natural. There was no shame or sense of embarrassment. People are people who all do the same stuff. We should always remember this. One hole private outhouses were considered impractical for large families.

  47. Swear every video she is trying to put women on a fucking petistol like holy damn wtf lady all of these terms for women fluids holes excretions muscles vaginal fluid clitoris maximus!Yes women and the all mighty uterus I know spelling get off of my back but quit making it like women come with all of the fucking things they do have its just a fucking muscle in your body my penis ain't nothing special but it gets the job done and yes I get it ain't isn't a word lol who gives a fuck.But its fucking sad like women are the dark web all of this internet you haven't seen but your on the PG13 version of google chrome with child settings on so you don't go on any bad websites like for fucking real women are not that special HEY YOUTUBE COMMENTERS MEMBER THAT SONG BY ARIANA GRANDE WHERE SHE SAID IN HER OWN WORDS GOD IS A WOMAN OK WOW.Ignorant feminist agenda ghost busters women feminist marvel captain marvel most over powered character bad ass in the entire movie of her wonder woman invincible fast as fuck reflexes time slowes down so she can use her amazonian wrist cuffs to shield innocent people from getting shot by german soldiers crossing no mans land like a boss in slow motion because she is all mighty woman even the new terminator dark fate mostly woman cast even the new terminator we see in the trailer is a woman terminator protecting the young girl sarrah conner I know spelling keep reading…….men in black the new one trailer lmao I swear woman as agent k and old white hair lady a men in black head boss bitch please not to mention the aweful star wars with rey and that purple hair commander bitch of the rebels your a pathetic man do my tactic hot headed pilot sharp shooting doesnt keep his cool in the movie rey autiomatically knows decades of the most disiplined jedi training in jut a day or a week Ii forget lmao its fucking annoying when she whoops kylo rens ass like nothing because the all mighty woman stop it with all of this feminist agenda bull shit quit shoving it down our fucking throats so bad ass kick every mans ass doesn't need a man so independent can multitask kick it into over drive laws of reality don't matter big mass tall buff guy vs frail small petite woman beating up every guy in sight so damn fast she can slow down time but still stay so seriene calm and keep her composure while still looking real feminine at the end of the movie she lets the poor guy date him but not realizing I A MAN HAVE A VOICE YELLING IN THE CORER TOO SAYING A RELATION SHIP GOES BOTH WAYS LADY I would never DATE FAKE………………………Never even ask the guy do you want to go out with me but knowing I do have a voice and choise and reject your sorry ass and say no your fucking ugly.

  48. Public bathrooms shouldn't be built like wide open locker rooms. There should be a bunch of single stall rooms side by side, just simply labeled toilet, sinks could be in the waiting room for those who just went or just need water. It seems really ridiculous that people insist that toilets be labeled by gender, everyone needs to go sometimes.

  49. I once used a unisex toilet and it felt cool,cos all the ladies in that toilet couldn’t care less if I was the only there..they didn’t tell to piss off,they were respectful of my privacy as I was there’s..I do my business and they do there’s..

  50. Hi there, just a quick tip should you be still having problems with PE. Look for Greyzar Drinbo’s site, there’s a program, not for everyone, designed for you to last up to one hour, and it never fails.

  51. The Three Seashells!
    Sylvester Stallone couldn’t figure out how to use them in Demolition Man & everyone made fun of him for it.
    There’s never been an official explanation of how to use the three seashells.
    Sandra Bullock was even asked about the three seashells in an interview… she didn’t have any explanation either.
    So since you posted pictures of the three seashells; perhaps you know the secrets behind how to use the three seashells???
    Inquiring minds want to know! Cheers 🥂, Love ❤️ your work!

  52. You obviously obviously have never been to a truck stop heck yeah make restrooms for both sexes. Let's say there's like 10 stalls at a truck stop and 9 of them are being used by big ole Burly dudes all are between 200 to 300 lb in this little teeny tiny 98 Pound female wants to use the restroom she gets the last stall and all the nine guys just took a dump now that's equal rights no sexism there just think of the smell she would smell hell I'd pay to see that

  53. I don't approve of transsexuals or 'gender queer',or anything like that, but I DO approve of toilets usable by both men and women.

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