Eric Swalwell: Fartgate 2019 | The Daily Show


While the impeachment train
rolled on, there’s an even bigger scandal
rocking D.C. today. And just a warning: if you have small children
at home, you should probably bring them
over to the TV to watch this. A congressman says
he was not responsible for a noise heard
during this interview. I’ve counted at least
five people testifying this week who were on the phone
listening to the president talk about this swap of dirt for U.S. military aid. Chris, so far,
the evidence is uncontradicted that the president
used taxpayer dollars to ask the Ukrainians
to help him cheat… -(passes gas)
-an election. (laughter) (cheering and applause) Okay, that was embarrassing. That was a fart on live TV. And it was a loud fart, too. Like, that thing was so loud, I bet someone
made a noise complaint. Just like, “Hello, 911? I think there’s been
a wet shooting?” And just so we all agree
that that was a fart, let’s play it one more time. The president
used taxpayer dollars to ask the Ukrainians
to help him cheat… -(passes gas)
-an election. (laughter and applause) Yeah, that was… that was unmistakably
a giant fart. It sounded like
a game show contestant got a question wrong
from inside Eric Swalwell’s ass. That’s what it sounded like. Although, although, to be fair, we don’t know that it was
Congressman Swalwell for sure. Like, it could have been
the host, Chris Matthews. Yeah. In fact,
this is the viral argument that everyone
has been talking about online. Who let it rip? And this clip
got so big, so big, that the two main suspects have actually had to come out
and address it publicly. NEWSMAN:
Swalwell says he didn’t do it, and even the Hardball
Twitter account for MSNBC says it wasn’t him
but instead blames a mug scraping across the desk. -Hmm.
-NEWSWOMAN: Okay. NEWSMAN: The congressman
shared that tweet, quoting in all caps,
“total exoneration,” seeming to take the whole thing
in good spirits. Because, look,
that’s embarrassing. Oh, that’s hilarious.
“Total exoneration.” Yeah. It’s a good joke
by Swalwell, but it’s actually not fair
to bring Trump into this, because he’s the one person
who wouldn’t try and hide it. He would try and own
a giant fart. Yeah, he’d be like,
“That’s right. I farted, “and it was the biggest,
most beloved fart of all time. “You know Obama
could never fart like this. “He tried, but he couldn’t
get it done, folks. Couldn’t do it.” So, for more
on this flatulent scandal, we’re now joined by
our senior D.C. correspondent, Desi Lydic, everybody. (cheering and applause) Desi… You’re there
in the Capitol building at the scene of the crime. What can you tell us? Yeah, well, Trevor,
the air is thick with speculation, intrigue and, obviously, farts. Uh, it’s clear
the impeachment proceedings have put Eric Swalwell under
an enormous amount of pressure, and yesterday on MSNBC, that pressure
was finally released. (laughter) But, Desi, MSNBC claims
the sound came from a mug. Ah, come on, a mug? Now, that’s a pathetic excuse. Think about it.
If mugs made fart noises, coffee shops
wouldn’t be relaxing. They’d sound like a yoga class
and retirement home. That’s a… that’s a good point,
but, Desi, how do you know it wasn’t Chris Matthews
who farted? Well, because, Trevor, the forensic evidence
doesn’t lie. Didn’t you see
Swalwell’s shoulders rise during the fart? He’s like a-a dog
sensing an earthquake right before the moment hits. And Swalwell’s quick denial
is the biggest tell of all. Might I remind you, Trevor, that the law says
he who denied it supplied it. It’s right there
in the Constitution. Y-You know, Desi,
n-normally, normally, that would convince me,
but, but a bunch of old clips have been resurfacing online
today because of the story and they show
that this isn’t the first time a fart has happened on
Chris Matthews’ show, all right? Like, listen. Listen carefully
to this clip from September. And these are absolutely real. What’s the penalty
for this kind of case? So, that really depends on
how it’s ultimately structured– if they were able to make -some sort of a tax charge here.
-(fart sound) (chuckles) Well, Desi? Okay, Trevor, yeah,
I-I did hear something, but, yeah, I don’t know, maybe Chris Matthews
was wearing leather pants. But-but it seems
to happen a lot though, Desi. Okay, here’s another clip
from his show in December. The president directed
that activity, according to this, uh–
this memorandum today. -Ken?
-Yes, Chris, and-and, in fact, you know, Michael Cohen already
stood up in court and said that -when he pleaded guilty
to these charges -(fart sound) in the Southern District
of New York. -You heard that, right?
-Yeah. No, but, you know,
that-that really– that could have been anything. For all we know, Rachel Maddow
was practicing the trumpet down the hall.
And, to be honest, Matthews wasn’t even on camera
when this happened, -so this proves nothing.
-Oh, come on. Come on, Desi.
Well, then what about this one? Just give me the skinny here. -Can we get a clean, fair,
-(fart sound) honest election in Florida
tomorrow? Come on, Desi.
That one was obviously him. I mean, he even paused.
He paused! He spoke, then the sound,
then he paused. He did that thing babies do
when they poop. Was like…
(babbles) (babbling) It’s clearly over, Desi. I’ll drop a mic, but Chris
Matthews would probably find a way to fart into it. No. Come on. Trevor! The only thing that this proves is that you’ve been googling
Chris Matthews’ farts all day. Oh– You know what, Desi,
I don’t understand why you’re defending
Chris Matthews so hard. Why can’t you just admit that this guy
is a one-man fart factory? Okay, I will tell you why,
Trevor. Because even though this
might be a silly story to you, there’s a real war on truth
happening right now in America, and we journalists are the ones
fighting on the front lines to defend all the institutions
we hold dear. In the words
of Edward R. Murrow, to be persuasive,
we must be believable. To be believable,
we must be credible. -And to be credible, we…
-(long fart sound) (fart stops) -Uh…
-Desi. -Hmm?
-W-Was that a… (high-pitched fart sound) (Desi clearing throat) Sorry, I was just, um… I was moving my mug around. Just… Desi Lydic, everyone.

Maurice Vega

100 Responses

  1. Hilarious..you can tell it was swallowswell because he inhales and lifts up to try and tighten his cheeks to lessen the blow.

  2. i'm pretty sure i just peed my pants…πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜πŸ˜„πŸ˜‚ or farted…πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

  3. i want to know who those 786 duds are that weren't laughing hysterically at this segment, and then gave it a thumbs down!!!!! omg… try laughter (or farting)…so much fun!!!!!

  4. Chris was right, it is a swap of dirty, dirty shorts, Yuk! Actually every fart I turn out is dedicated to tRump, the Orange Clown🀬🀬🀬🀯🀯🀯🀯

  5. It did sound like a mug being pushed across the table. But old dude did pause between words when the fart escaped, sooo…

  6. Yes I laughed, yes it is embarrassing. But everybody farts we all do..lol the fact that it happened during live TV… I pity him..lol

  7. Ahahahah goddam that was loud as hell…im sure republicans will call it a hoax, a fake fart, a fart created by the democrats to destroy the republican party. Because rather than try fix and run our country, democrats and republicans will continue to fight and attack each other…both parties are lying useless twats

  8. Democrats are useless lying babies, republicans are paranoid, power hungry, lying clowns..both parties are barely getting anything done because they are to busy having pissing matches and fighting. And the general population are to busy arguing over who's ideals and beliefs are superior to do anything about it. Its embarrassing both parties and their cult followers are useless wastes of air

  9. We demand our rights. Swalwell is our Spokesperson.
    https://agent54nsa.blogspot.com/2013/06/agent-54here-again_1499.html

  10. A mug sliding across a desk. Is that like " you didn't see a UFO that was just swamp gas". He even flared his nostrils just a little bit when it happened.

  11. I'm surprised CNN didnt step in with "BREAKING" news" ..funny how Eric is denying it..the pause, the shoulder, the smirk..lmao

  12. HE EVEN LIFTED A CHEEK. You saw him move to let the fart I mean come on. No burritos for you buddy. That's Mexican VENGENCE…….LOL

  13. yes he did fart. Watch it again and you will see he built up to it and then he stopped talking and farted then started talking again. LMAO

  14. Swallwell really enjoyed it. He may start open industrial plant in calif….called swallowell fartso plant specialized in farting faculty.

  15. And I thought people watch Chris Matthews for the BS…at least the butt burst is real news…I heard it verbatim with my own ears. If you're not gonna report breaking news, might as well do breaking wind! πŸ€£πŸ˜‚

  16. He who denied it, supplied it.

    The smeller's the feller.

    He who smelt it, dealt it!!

    πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

  17. WOW,,,,Trevor actually picked on a Democrat,,fairness is funnier, I love Trump jokes but I'm burnt out on only those, the comment about Trumps fart was hilarious.

  18. That was not a sliding mug. Swalwel could have launched himself into orbit with that one. Apparently no one briefed Swalwel on food choice before the interview. Rewatch the video. Swalwel lifted up slightly both times. Chris Matthews looked like he was about to explode trying to hold in his laugh.

  19. That fart had body to it! It is farts like that,thatcan burn the hair out of your nostrills and remove paint from the walls. Fumingation of the area is useless the damage is to great. Swalwell will go down in history as the man that fired the fart heard around the world! What a claim to fame!

  20. Let's see… Lie #1:Β  Swallwell texting "It wasn't me!!!!!".Β  Lie #2:Β  Swalwell then says "I didn't hear anything'.Β  Then, his buddy from MSNBC…. Chris says "It was my coffee cup".Β  That is the most ridiculous crap I've ever heard.Β  Where is President Trump at when you need his tweets on this…. I wish Trump had tweeted "Yeah, fake news!Β  Like anyone would want to buy a farting coffee cup.Β  Fake news, people, Fake news."

  21. They should have blamed it on the cameraman. Since we dont know who he/she is they could have done like Schiffty and protect the fartblower.

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